Someone posted something on FB the other day about how anxiety disorder can give you super powers. It was a nice article but sort of cute. Running today I thought more about the subject:
The thing about anxiety that I find so transformative is the way it makes me feel after the panic has subsided. After the cold hard clasp around my neck has loosened, replaced by the familiar damp comfort of my own sweat I am in awe of it all. I am in awe of the rhythm of my breath, and the continuing beat of my heart muscle encased in blood that circulates through my entire body, from the top of my head to the tip of my toes, blood I can see sometimes when I make an error in judgement. This is the gift of anxiety, something others might experience through the use of hallucinogenic drugs, or near life-near death experiences. I can't say I've been near death in a clinical manner but the way one with anxiety faces the limitless abyss of ones own making is a kind of death that you experience but then are pardoned from and in this after life you have a new awareness, your senses are heightened. Some people might say you are a very sensitive person... but I say We are alive.